How to Fix your Marriage: The Biblical Way

So is your Relationship a bit of a fixer upper?  The Bible actually provides a great set of tools to fine tune even the worst of them.  They are surprising simple to use.  You just have to be willing to employ them.  They all come from I Corinthians chapter 7 and I will outline them for you below.

The Three Essential tools to making any Marriage Work

• Be Willing to Minster to your Spouse’s need

•  Be Committed to your Spouse

•  Be Willing to be Personally Sanctified

Tool Number 1:  Be Willing to Minister to your Spouse’s need.

Normally, people who get engaged and marry are usually all smiles.  Their partner has chosen them and they feel loved for it.  They look forward to their future with their spouse.  The main reason for all this optimism in the beginning is normally because of one thing.  Each person has the expectation that their spouse will make them happy by fulfilling all their needs.  Most people focus on this alone and show little regard for what will be expected of them in this new relationship.  So when marriage ensues their partner’s expectations come as a bit of a surprise to them.  In marriage comes the time when two selfish people have to make good on delivering those expectations.  If both parties take the time to learn what is expected of them in the relationship and show a commitment to meeting those needs, all is truly well.  If people try to back out of the deal, things do not work out so well.  Partners need to remember that marriage is also a ministry and not just a Bless me club.  As a Husband or Wife it’s your responsibility to minister to the needs of your spouse.  Not because you have to, but because you want to.    A Husband who renders the emotional affection a wife craves will make for himself a very happy Wife.  A Wife who renders the physical affection a husband craves will make for herself a very happy Husband.  Ministering to our spouse’s needs is how we demonstrate our love for them.  Be faithful to fulfill them and you make it all the harder for Satan to destroy the relationship.

Tool Number 2:  Be Committed to staying with your Spouse.

Marriage is not for wimps.   Life is not always easy and conflicts do arise.  Having conflicts is not the problem, our response to them is.  Trials always reveal a person’s true feelings for thier spouse.  They show your true metal; what you are made of.  If you bail when the going gets tough, it always proves your love to be conditional.   Conditional love is only a fair weather friend at best.  Real love never fails.  If you fail you never had real love.    Seeing trials and conflicts thru to their conclusion proves you have that staying power.  Your commitment proves your love for your spouse.  Seeing them thru the dark times builds trust and opens the door for deeper levels of intimacy.  Everyone wants intimacy in their relationships, but you only earn it through perseverance.  Every trial and conflict provides the opportunity to bring your relationship to that next deeper level.  Don’t bail out just because it gets a little tough.  I have known couples who survived thru difficult adversities to later thrive on the other side simply because of a mutual commitment to stick it out.

Tool Number 3: Be Willing to be Personally Sanctified.

You can’t be a jerk in your relationship and expect it to survive.  Hormones may get people to marry but it only takes sin to tear it apart.  Sin is always what makes any marriage relationship fall apart, without exception.  God has an interest in making you a better person and He often uses your spouse to help him do it.  People’s sin really does stand in the way of making a relationship work.  Be willing to shed your personal faults when called upon to do so and your relationship will thrive.  A person willing to shed his faults for a spouse is a great expression of love.  It shows you care about someone enough to do it. A person first willing to shed their own faults earns the right to require the same of their spouse.    

These three tools are really all it takes to fix your marriage.  They are simple and straightforward.  Once employed, a couple will find themselves well on the path to having something special, something holy.

Related Links:
Sexual Immorality: Cannot Drag to Heaven. Be Washed to be Saved
Why Should I avoid Sexual Immorality?
Nudity, Foreplay Sex: Only in the Marriage Bed do they Make Love
Divorce-Biblical Guidelines for when it's permitted
Affairs, Infidelity: You cannot find love with a cheat
Prostitution, Harlotry: You cannot buy Real Love  
Pornography & Erotica: Only Breed Envy
Masturbation: What can be more Selfish?
Why Porn can't Spice up your Sex Life: Life imitates Art
Promiscuity, Orgies, & Polygamy: Only Raise Costs not Benefits
Flirtation, Seduction, & Innuendo: Only a Fool's Errand
Voyeurism, Peeping, Staring: Not only Breeds Envy but Shame
Sexually Transmitted Diseases: Do you have to learn the Hard Way?